-melissa- wishhed*
9:00 AM
do u know why im so unhappy... do u know what exactly happened to me?
i was very unhappy n sad...
coz u left me alone.
n i dont like u staying up so late. at outside some more. i understand u need to meet up with ur frens and spend time with them as well.
this is normal. in ur every relationship.
baby, i guess u really lack of the understanding of ur girlfriend.
to me, u're the whole world. i can meet non of my frens just to spend more time with you.
i can dont sleep just to accompany you.
do u still remember that longevity burger... i wanted to try for so long alr. but i juz wanted to wait for u n try with you. but when i told me, u had alr eaten it... yea.. i guess.. i was just being the silly one.
i know i love u too much... devoted to you alr. u mean the whole world to me now.
i cannot love a person so much. my whole life will turn upside down. frens n family... not as important as u. can sacrifies anything just to be with you. even my ex gf whom i used to love a lot. n cared a lot. tho she hurt me so so much.
im giving u everything.
im willing to spend everything on you. rather on myself.
i can dont eat... just to save that lil amount of money so that... we could hav a bit more.
i always looking forward to see you everyday. tho i might get disappointed sometimes.
u just mean so much to me. n u never know how lonely i m without u.
each day when u were not with me, im just alone in my room doin nothing. online, msn, chatting. no more. do u know how lonely i can be. all i hope is to c u asap. time passes faster. but it just seems as if tmr never comes.
sometimes i just feel very hurt of what u did n what u said.
i know it s the past... but i will still feel uneasy bout everthing. sighs.
im super anti social.
i guess u never know about this. i dont really love showing myself up to strangers.
i feel very uneasy and very fearful.
i just stay close to my own frens
sometimes even my close frens dont get to see me in more than 2 months or more. ''
only hui teng understands me.. the real me.
i dont wannna tell u bout this... i want u to be happy.
even tho i'm filled with the uneasiness, with all the sadness... n hurt...
i still want u to be happy...
must be happy.. for me n for urself...
i love you...
-melissa- wishhed*
8:34 AM
well...
im feeling depressed right now.. missing her so so much. so god damned much.
i really hate this feeling of missing and yet i love to miss her n not wanting this feeling to fade away. baby.. u're juz that important to me.
feeling lonely... depressed... without u by my side
i need u badly... real badly...
i hate not to have you around
i hate myself... for not controlling my emotions well
i hate being sad n disappointed
i hate feeling the easy-feeling-insecurities
i hate being jealous FOR NOTHING
i hate myself... sighs
im very moody
n im very depressed..
coz i miss her too much, i gguess
really hope to c u soon..
if not, i'll be even more depressed than now..
how i wish time would pass faster a bit..
juz a lil' bit will do..
juz a lil' bit will be enough
juz a lil' bit, i'll be satisfied.
baby... i need u so badly...
in my arms... and through the nights..
i love you
-melissa- wishhed*
5:21 AM
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